First Impressions, January to March: Orion, Kung Fu Panda, and The Casagrandes

You know, doing singular First Impressions is fine, I don't mind doing it, but it doesn't really help that much when I don't have scheduled releases for them. So, here's what I'm gonna do, I'm going to do what Crash Thompson does... or did. For those unfamiliar, Crash Thompson is a music reviewer on YouTube, most notable for his series How To Get Into, Bad Album Covers, and some old series about a dorky alt. rock back from the 90s nobody's ever heard of. When he was doing reviews of new releases, he did a series called FIMI, which is an acronym which I will not be revealing because I have a rule about swearing. Basically, he compiled a bunch of albums that were newly released and gave his thoughts on them in a quicker... well "Quicker" manner than full on reviews.

So I'm gonna do something similar, because A). This let's me talk about more movies, B). This lets me have an excuse to keep things short, C). I can post this on a scheduled time instead of randomly, and D). I can add to this every time I see a movie. Basically, I'm going to introduce the movie, give the release date, and I'll also give you when I wrote that particular portion of this blog, so if I make an observation or prediction, I don't have to tell people which bit I wrote before or after the other. So, now that I have explained how this all worked, let's get to the actual movies.

ORION AND THE DARK
Released: February 2nd, 2024
Portion Written: February 6th, 2024

Oh DreamWorks, literally the day before this movie was released on Netflix, I called DreamWorks one of my favourite animation studios, and that is still true, but... it's movies like this that make me hesitate a little. Orion and The Dark is a pretty bad movie, it's a story within a story movie, like The Grand Budapest Hotel, but like... it made me think more of that Simpsons episode "The Seemingly Never Ending Story", which mocked this kind of story telling. If only the story telling was this movie's only problem. The comedy of this movie was not very funny, one of the entities is meant to induce sleeping in people, and they do this by smothering them with pillows, chloroforming them and hitting them with hammers... I'm sorry, this isn't funny, I get the joke, but that doesn't mean it's funny. I also wasn't a huge fan of he art style, but I think that's mostly just a nitpick.

I kind of expect this movie to be really divisive, like a "Love it or Hate it" type movie, but unlike something like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas which achieves this by being both enjoyable and horribly uncomfortable, this movie does it by virtue of... being just complicated enough to make others feel smug, I guess. I'm just saying, don't be surprised if people take the Rick and Morty meme and use it to make fun of this movie's fanbase in the future. (Remember I'm writing this portion in February.)

I can't really recommend this one too much, on the bright side, this is also like Ruby Gillman in that I can see a really good movie in here... but I think I actually prefer Ruby Gillman to this one.

KUNG FU PANDA 4
Released: March 8, 2024
Portion Written: March 10th, 2024

From one of DreamWork's lesser movies, to one of their better franchises. After having done a whole marathon of the previous Kung Fu Panda movies, I was all set for this one. Kung Fu Panda 3 was, in my opinion, a solid way to end the series and a fourth film just kind of felt unnecessary, plus the advertising did this movie zero favors, look at this point the only people who don't know that the Kung Fu Panda movies are more than dumb Kung Fu comedies are young kids and people who don't respect animation. I'm just saying, Frozen II could have an awesome trailer, but a Kung Fu Panda movie needed to have one that only emphasized the lamer jokes of the movie?

Thankfully, DreamWorks... usually know what they are doing, and the team behind Kung Fu Panda 4 really gave us another fantastic movie. Admittedly it is not as good as two, or even three, but those are tough acts to follow. Ultimately, it is worthy of being a Kung Fu Panda movie. It once again, feels like a more natural continuation, sort of... I feel like this part of Po's story is rushed, I mean yeah, eight years is not that short of time, plus there was an entire series that took place after three, but like... it doesn't feel like that long has passed. Besides that, admittedly tiny nitpick, I had a good time with this movie, I liked the new character, I liked Po's conflict, and as usual the action scenes are pretty top notch, honestly the fight with Lord Shen from two may have some competition as my favourite fight scene in these movies.

I did kind of miss the Furious Five, a lot of what I loved about the other three movies was Po's relationship with the Five, but all in all, I can't say I'm disappointed. I don't think I can Highly recommend this one, but it's a tough call. Hopefully the next DreamWork's movie will be excellent.

THE CASAGRANDES MOVIE
Released: March 22, 2024
Portion Written: March 25, 2024

You know, this is my first dive into anything Loud House related, because I never really watched any episode of The Loud House or The Casagrandes, and I missed out on the Loud House movie. So, my first impressions are... wow this was boring.

Really, boring is the best word I could use to describe this movie, boring and predictable. Every joke in this movie was something I've seen before, and there are no new twists on them, and as soon as the opening with the modern slang talking ancient God was finished, I knew exactly how this story was going to go. If you're curious, just watch A Goofy Movie and Hercules at the same time, guarantee it's a more interesting experience.

I missed out on The Tiger's Apprentice and the new Megamind movie, I don't guarantee I'll get to them before the year ends, this era of streaming is... kinda stupid honestly, but that's a rant for a different day. I have heard that I'm not missing much on either of them, but still. So far, the movies released have been, meh, like if Orion or Casagrandes are my pick for worst movie of the year, than I'll genuinely be surprised, maybe I'll try and get around to that Megamind movie soon. Regardless, this is still the early months, all the major releases are going to be coming out more towards the summer so I can't really say I'm too disappointed so far. So, how would I rank this set of movies?

Orion gets a Not Recommended
Kung Fu Panda 4 gets a Recommendation
Casagrandes gets a Not Recommended

With all that said, I've got a movie review to write. Fare-thee-well.

Top 20 Worst Movies I've reviewed (100 Reviews Special)

I've had multiple ideas about how to celebrate one-hundred reviews, and I settled on the idea of going through and listing the five worst movies from each quarter. Then I decided to just to a traditional top 20. It was a fairly last minute choice, but I like writing lists, and this felt less convoluted than the other option. If I had to pick one word to describe this batch of one-hundred movies, I would use the word... challenging, a lot of the movies I reviewed were movies I probably would not have watched if I wasn't doing this blog, movies that I had to find something new to talk about, and of course, movies that were just unwatchable trite. After one-hundred movies, one is bound to come across some distinct varieties of garbage that you probably never thought were even possible until you actually saw them. Some aren't so bad, like a used dryer sheet or a crumpled newspaper, and some are even unique pieces of garbage that you almost want to admire, but at the end of the day, I didn't really care for any of these movies, and I'll be happy to not really think about them afterwards. These are the worst movies I've had to review for this blog.

Also, please enjoy the new thumbnails I made, I have updated every one of my previous reviews with these thumbnails and I wanted to use them here.

20. The Bugs Bunny/Road Runner Movie

Of all the movies on this list, this one is probably the one I want to put here the least. There was a time when a movie like this was an ingenious idea, compiling some of the best shorts and tying them together in a narrative, a little more involved than the original Disney Package Films, no? Ultimately, watching this movie made me really wish I was just watching the original shorts, cutting pieces off of the ends, putting them in a not so great order, it really made this movie suffer. You can find complete collections of every Looney Tunes short by era, character, animator, I mean you can probably find compilations for what title cards the shorts have, so the base question becomes if the new animated content is worth it, and frankly... I don't think so.

19. The Transformers: The Movie

Oh... this one is not going to make me any fans. I ultimately couldn't put Fun and Fancy Free on this list, despite being the worse movie, I've grown an attachment to it, there was a reason it was the first movie I reviewed on this blog, so I have to appreciate it on some level. The same can't be said for The Transformers movie though, it's just a sloppy movie with a messy plot that only existed to bring us to some admittedly alright action scenes, overly detailed designs, and a wildly out of place centerpiece single for the soundtrack. Plus, not every vocal performance was the best, sorry Orson Welles, but this was not the great curtain drawn for your career was one would hope. I know this movie is nostalgic for a lot of people, but that is the thing about nostalgia, it betrays you more than you think it does.

18. The Swan Princess

You know, the funny thing about this movie is, it's so uninspired and dull that as I was writing my review of it, I actually began to second guess myself. Not because this movie is secretly brilliant, but because I genuinely could not remember if the problems I brought up were genuine problems or if I was just blowing stuff out of proportion, and that was literally seconds after I watched the darn movie. One of the most shameless attempts to steal Disney's thunder, the movie had poor pacing, awful songs and animation that was... meh at best. I don't see why this movie needed an endless amount of sequels, but I'm glad they all went straight to DVD.

17. Open Season

Picking the fifth worst movie from the fourth quarter of reviews (Reviews 76-100) was a toss up between this, an uninspired and generic kids movie, and Silver Circle, a poorly made, mediocrely written movie that was a political statement before it was entertainment. In the end, I'm kinder to smaller scale productions, and Sony Pictures is not a small production. Honestly, I said this was one of my favourite movies as a kid, but even then I remember realizing that the movie wasn't that good when I was still young, maybe early teens, don't quite remember when. This is just not a movie that sticks with you, and frankly it is the perfect movie to begin an animation studio with. Like I said with Mummies, bad gets forgotten but mediocre at best movies that are inoffensive and not too challenging stick around, because they're perfect for doing something as a family, anything as a family. Open Season is not the worst example in this regard, but it's up there.

16. Robinson Crusoe (Otherwise Known As: The Wild Life)

Speaking of uninspired, mediocre at best movies that are inoffensive, unchallenging and just perfect for watching when you want to watch a movie, but not necessarily any movie. Absolutely bland, forgettable schlock that you only put on to entertain the kids while you do anything else. It's an agonizingly dull sit through and easily in the list of worst "That Kind of Movie" films, yeah, I'm gonna start calling movies like this, Open Season, Mummies, UglyDolls "That Kind of Animated Movie", the kind that you think of when you think of "Animated Movie". Anyway, there really isn't much else to say about Robinson Crusoe, it's such a forgettable experience, I only remember one scene where Crusoe just stared at a Tapir's waving butt for a couple seconds... like what were they doing with that shot?

15. Space Jam

Of all the movies that don't work, the one I'm most perplexed about is Space Jam. What is it about this movie that didn't work? Was it the writing? Was it the directing? or was this just an idea that was dead on arrival? I guess it's a combination of the writing and directing, because it is a fairly uneven movie, the good elements are not good enough to distract from the bad elements surrounding it including the dated CG integration, the humour that is trying but just isn't that funny, the subpar acting of Michael Jordan, the subpar character of Lola Bunny. Honestly, this is one of those movies where the soundtrack is ten times better than the actual movie, let's just be real.

14. Wonder Park

I was initially kind to this movie, because while it was a generic, bland, and not very well written movie, I thought the creativity was good and would maybe inspire some kids. I was much kinder to it than other reviewers were, then I gave it a rewatch and found that those reviewers were actually right. Honestly, Cellspex and MrEnter both have done better jobs at explaining why this movie doesn't work than I could, and most of the points I could bring up would just be their words, or Animated Antic's words. Well, at the very least I can say... I'm not budging on Detective Pikachu.

13. Tom and Jerry: The Movie

What a strange way to make a movie based off of two beloved animation icons. Giving them the benefit of the doubt that the orphaned girl looking for her father, the evil family members, awful songs, characters that were mute suddenly speaking, Rip Taylor, the thrilling chases and around the country adventures were all necessary for this movie to be made, that the only way they could have made a Tom and Jerry movie was to have all of that stuff put into it, at least make the comedy good. This movie had some of the worst slapstick I've ever seen. Nothing felt right, nothing felt like there was any weight to it, the reactions didn't feel right, it just didn't feel like a Tom and Jerry movie. Take this plot and replace Tom and Jerry with, Mickey Mouse or Felix The Cat, and that would solve a good twenty percent of the issues with this movie, not enough to make it good, but enough to make it... less bad.

12. Disney Princess Enchanted Tales: Follow Your Dreams

I mean, what is there to say about this movie? If we can even call it that. It's two stories that really don't understand the morals they're trying to teach, with mediocre animation and voice acting. This was one of, if not the last of the Disney direct-to-video movies and it has been rightfully forgotten. They were actually planning a whole series of these movies, and there is a trailer for the second one on the DVD, which would have featured stories with Mulan and Cinderella. Someone get that to the Lost Media Wiki, might be the only thing talking about in regards to this movie.

11. Hercules & Xena - The Animated Movie: The Battle For Mount Olympus

Oh direct-to-video awfulness, there is a reason most critics ignore direct-to-video nonsense in favour of the stuff released cinematically. Though there are some excellent movies released straight to video, this one clearly isn't one of them. Awful animation that uses budget stretching tricks from animation in the sixties, some of the worst facial expressions in animation, and some of the lousiest songs ever in a pseudo-musical, it makes sense why Hercules and Xena were never featured heavily in animation, since this attempt was so misguided and awful, it actually enters "So bad it's good" territory, seriously, if you love movies like Birdemic, The Room, or Plan 9 From Outer Space, give this movie a watch, it will make you laugh.

10. Felix the Cat: The Movie

You would think the feature film debut of one of animations icons, one of the earliest animated characters to grace the silver screen and a major figure in animation history, would be a little bit more respectful of all of that history. Annoying, poorly written, nonsensical, it truly is amazing how badly you can mess up an idea as "Movie with animation icon", it would be like making a Mickey Mouse movie, but instead of having him go on an epic adventure, he sits at an office desk and does tax filings all day. Actually that movie would probably be better than this, solely for being less annoying. Honestly, I should have given this movie an Avoid rating, just for being a slap in the face to animation lovers, but then again, I don't think that many people are really upset that a Felix the Cat movie ended up being this awful.

9. My Little Pony: The Movie

I wanted to give this movie a fair chance. I am a former Brony, I had some fun with the 2017 movie, I love me some animation history, I thought at the very least, this movie couldn't be an agonizing watch. Well boy howdy was I wrong! Not only was this movie an insufferable sit through, it was also everything I hoped it wouldn't be. Shameless marketing, pandering to the target audience, and the usual amount of disrespect to the actual voice actors whom we would actually watch this movie for if we were fans of the original show. Poor Charlie Adler, Nancy Cartwright and Russi Taylor, among others, were not given opening credits, but the awful performances by Cloris Leachman, Madeline Kahn and Rhea Perlman were warranting of opening credits. At least The Transformers movie had some good action scenes, this movie couldn't even get a decent filler scene.

8. The Thief and the Cobbler

Okay, forget the fact that this movie had a production nightmare and ended up being taken from the hands of the original creator, let's just look at what this movie is. It is a gorgeously animated pile of garbage that was re-edited in a manor to better befit that of a Disney movie and completely ruined what could of been a great magnum opus of animation. However, let's add that production nightmare back into this equation, because not one, not two, not three, not four, not five, not six, not seven, not eight, not nine, not ten, but eleven people who worked on this movie died before it saw the light of day, and poor Vincent Price died only a month after this movie got a major release. I repeat what I said about Paws of Fury, there are some movies I'd rather not have than have in as a sorry state as this. Thankfully, the Recobbled Cut exists, and it is leagues better, so find that online and give it a watch.

7. Storybook Classics: The Hunchback of Notre Dame

The best thing I can say about this movie, is that I found it for dirt cheap, but even then I think I spent too much on it. One of the most befuddling movies I've ever seen, befuddled by how the managed to boil any complexity down to plain, flat and boring characters. I am especially befuddled by the video and audio quality of the movie, as the DVD I purchased looked and sounded no better than a standard VHS, it even had that background hiss that VHS Tapes have. Add to that annoying voice work, and some admittedly good visuals absolutely ruined by the lack of any upscale in quality, and you have a movie that I am... honestly surprised I managed to write a review for, even one that was rather phoned in.

6. GoodTimes Entertainment's Cinderella

Why is this one of my most viewed blogs? Either way, with the vibes of "We only made this movie because Disney was in the midst of a renaissance and we wanted some of their pie", this movie was easily prime material for this list. Honestly, it's not even the fact that it's clearly a poor attempt to take some of Disney's video release money from deceived elderly relatives that puts it on this list. It's on this list by being an even worse knock off than one could imagine, ruining the moral of the Disney version, adding in a bunch of cartoony crap that makes the movie even worse, and such poor animation that it gives direct-to-video animation a bad name. Why is it not in the top 5? Honestly, I'm kinder to direct-to-video movies than theatrical ones, but make no mistake, this is still avoid rating territory here.

5. The Magic Voyage

Usually, when ranking my worst list, a big part of my decision making is this one thought, "Would I rather watch this movie, or that movie?". Of course there is a lot more that goes into it than that, but when the ranking becomes tricky, that is usually what settles it. Would I rather watch The Magic Voyage over the next movies on this list? Yeah, yeah I would, because even though it's obnoxious, poorly written, bizarre, filled with unnecessary scenes, a complete disregard to actual history, and one of the worst dub jobs I have ever watched, honestly I can't even say it's well put together, it at the very least wasn't a painfully agonizing experience that could be equated to Vogon poetry.

4. The Barbie Diaries

I would normally hold a spot in the top five for a movie that had a major release. A bad movie, I find, is so much worse when it hits the cinemas. Like, yes it is partly an elitism thing, but straight-to-video and television movies are so much easier to ignore than a movie that is released theatrically or released on a major streaming platform. In the scale of ignorable, you have Theatres, Major Streaming Release, Minor Streaming Release, Television Movie, Direct-to-Video, and then you have movies only released on YouTube or something. The Barbie Diaries actually managed to be so bad, I would call this movie an insult to Television movies. Holy crap, the animation of this movie was so primitive, even by the standards of 2006, when actual TV shows from earlier years and for lesser properties, managed to look way better. The plot was vapid, the characters were bland, it was an amalgamation of everything I hate about High School movies. No, I don't hate this because it's a Barbie movie, I hate this because it is a terrible movie, and I'll bet it's also terrible by Barbie movie standards. I can't even call this movie "So bad it's good", it's not entertaining, it's infuriating. If someone makes you watch this movie, they want you to atone for something you did. This movie certaintly is not Kenough.

3. Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within

I... can't muster the hatred for this one as much anymore. Don't get me wrong, it's still a really bland and boring, poorly written waste of a promising license, and I absolutely can't stand it for all those reasons. This movie was so phenomenally boring that I don't think I'm using the word improperly for the purposes of hyperbole, I genuinely think that the boringness of this movie is a phenomena that needs to be studied. How does a Final Fantasy movie not only have nothing to do with Final Fantasy, but also manages to be an absolute dull as a butter knife snore fest? Are we sure this isn't like... an SCP that escaped the laboratory and disguised itself as a movie to feed on the souls of the people it bores to sleep? So yeah, this is a boring movie, but the worst I've watched for this blog? Bland, boring, poorly written and wasting a promising license is pretty bad, but it ain't really infuriating.

2. Ferngully: The Last Rainforest

I know this movie has its fans, but I honestly don't get it, this movie is awful. It's one of the blandest, most boring, preachiest movies I have ever seen. "But it was about saving the environment", yeah and? Just because the intention is good doesn't mean the end product is any good. "but Robin Williams!" Yes, but this was not one of his better performances, I miss him too, but that doesn't mean everything he did was gold. "Tim Curry, and the songs", look, you can keep throwing out excuses, but nothing actually changes the fact that this movie is a boring, formulaic, preachy, and shameless product of the 1990s, easily one of the worst movies I ever had to sit through for this blog. It was so close to being number one, but I do have to relent that on some level, it was made with good intentions, I think you know where I'm going with this.

1. Duck Duck Goose

I mean, you probably saw this one coming. A movie does not earn the title "Worst animated movie of 2018" by being mediocre, though mediocrity is easily one of the biggest flaws of the movie. With some of the worst comedy I've ever seen in an animated movie, this was the movie that made me realize that Netflix would stick their name on any old garbage and hope enough people watched it to make a profit. Unlikable characters, wasted voice talent, this movie almost makes me regret getting into animation, and I'd say Jim Gaffigan could do better, but considering he went on to do Playmobil: The Movie, maybe that would be wrong. Ferngully was a bad movie that was at least intended to have good intentions behind it, I can't think of any other intentions behind Duck Duck Goose than making a movie that will keep children quite, and I have zero respect for movies like this.

Despite all the garbage I watch, I am still really thankful for this blog. For every Duck Duck Goose or Ferngully, I'll get the chance to check out something that would genuinely surprise me, or a movie that is just a comfortable viewing experience. These past one-hundred reviews have really let me explore the medium I love, and really let me step out of my comfort zone. Honestly, even though these movie have been really bad, I can't say I regret starting this blog, or continuing on with it. These past few years have been an interesting experience, and I wouldn't want to trade it in for anything else. So, to all of you who have read this, even if this is your first time reading, thank you, because knowing that someone reads this makes the experience just that tiny bit more worth it.

Honourable Mentions:

1. A Christmas Carol 2009 - So close to being one of the worst, but the stuff that is good just keeps it from being on here.
2. Once Upon a Forest - I mean... it's better than Ferngully.
3. Monster High: 13 Wishes - If this were a proper movie and not a TV Special repackaged as a movie, it might have been okay.
4. The Three Caballeros - Frankly, I wouldn't be on America's side after a movie like this.
5. Cats - Honestly, this movie is over hated.
6. Rock-A-Doodle - Don Bluth... why?
7. A Christmas Carol 1997 - Yeah, they're both on this side of the list, not even Tim Curry could save this one.
8. Silver Circle - Not every piece of lost media needs to be found.

The Fox and The Hound (1981) - A Heartbreaking Cult Classic

 

One Hundred movie reviews, I always knew I wanted my one-hundredth movie review to be special, a movie I had strong feelings for, and it boiled down to one of my favourite animated movies, or one of my least favourite animated movies. It was a tough decision, but at the end of it all, I made my choice, and I've planned on this being my one-hundredth movie review for a long time, and that is because, at the time, The Fox and the Hound was my favourite animated movie, second only to Whisper of the Heart. Don't get me wrong, it is still one of my favourite movies ever, but I think I have to give the title of "favourite animated movie" to Treasure Planet right now, so I guess it's not a really special one-hundredth review, eh? Still, The Fox and the Hound is a great movie, and it is about time I give it some much due appreciation.

We follow Tod, a young Fox, whose mother is shot by a hunter and he gets taken in by a lonely widow. Meanwhile, her neighbor, a hunter by name of Amos Slade, brings home a new puppy by name of Copper. While Tod and Copper become friends, Tod also earns the ire of Amos and his old dog, Chief, and after a long hunting trip, Tod and Copper grow up and find they can't be friends anymore. The movie, plotwise I think, can mostly be split into four parts, the stuff with Tod and Copper as kids, the stuff before Tod gets dropped into the game preserve, the game preserve, and Amos and Copper hunting down Tod. I think the only part I really am not into is the stuff in the game preserve, I dunno it just kind of becomes Bambi for a couple minutes. Barring that, the rest of the movie is pretty well done, the first third or so with the characters as kids is pretty nice, a bit slow but it's necessary to build the relationship. There has been some criticisms about the strength of the plot, specifically with things like Tod's mother being shot offscreen and Chief not dying after being hit by a train. In regards to the former, I think everyone knew that she was killed, I heard that they wanted it to be left open, like maybe she got away, but everyone knew she didn't. As for the latter, yeah, I kind of agree. I do think a lot of Copper's arc would be a lot stronger if Chief did get killed. While it does have some weak spots, as a whole the plot does a good job at getting the important stuff to us.

Even if I think that Copper's arc could be stronger, the actual characters are pretty strong. Tod is playful, and that gets him into mischief, and Copper is torn between two worlds, one where he's a hunting dog and another where he's a friend. I also really like Widow Tweed and Amos Slade as well. I can't say they have particularly strong or deep characterization, but they are identifiable, and they got the job done. You also have a bit of comic relief with two birds named Dickie and Boomer who are trying to get a caterpillar. It's cute and offers a nice distraction. It also helps that Richard Bakalyan and Paul Winchell are their voices. Speaking of, this movie is pretty star studded, Kurt Russell, Mickey Rooney, Pearl Bailey, Jack Albertson, Sandy Duncan, Pat Buttram, Jeanette Nolan, all of them turn in a pretty good performance. Honestly, Jack Albertson as Amos Slade might be my favourite underrated performance of a Disney villain, it really does add to the character. Keith Coogan and Corey Feldman are the voices of young Tod and young Copper respectively and they're fine, I can imagine worse actors getting these roles.

Animation wise this movie is actually rather special, this is the last movie that each member of Disney's Nine Old Men worked on together, also featuring some work from uncredited animators by names of Tim Burton, Brad Bird and John Lasseter. The visual look of this film is pretty nice, it isn't that clean and polished style we would get with The Little Mermaid, but it also isn't the same sketchy style from previous Disney movies, this era of Disney almost has it's own unique style somewhere between that sketchbook style and the polished style we got with the renaissance. I also like how they didn't go for a very bright and lush colour palette, how the forest is kind of grungy, fitting the environment of the coniferous forest. That doesn't make this movie ugly, in fact it has a couple pretty moments, but it is true that this isn't one of Disney's most beautiful movies... visually speaking. One thing though, the Bear at the end climax almost feels a little out of place, it is very well designed, but the way it moves is just kind of strange. I think ultimately, the visuals are good, but they do kind of die by comparison to a lot of the Disney's later work, honestly I do think that The Little Mermaid just kind of swept the late Dark Age movies under the rug.

So I have a few nitpicks about the movie, but frankly I don't think it's really the fault of this movie. It had a troubled production and it really isn't anyone's fault that a movie gets overshadowed by another. Disney wasn't doing well in the late 70s and early 80s. That being said, the pieces are still here and they still all work, really good voice acting, excellent animation, and a truly heart breaking story. Yeah I haven't really commented on the emotional aspect of this story, but that's something everyone talks about, and really it is for good reason. Seeing Tod be released into the game preserve, Copper at the end after Tod fights off the bear, these are all well done moments, and they are the reason this movie has a reputation. I think that is a large reason as to why I can't say The Fox and the Hound is my favourite animated movie anymore, because it is one of those movies you really just need to be in the right mood to watch, and that mood is "I want to shatter my heart into more pieces than there are atoms in the universe". That said, if you are in that mood, or you really love these kinds of stories, I say give it a go. Even if you aren't in the right mood, it is still a wonderful movie, and it is still one of my favourites so... what can I say? It really does deserve a High Recommendation.

Dark Souls and the Difference Between Movie Genres and Video Game Genres (Or fixating on an argument I heard once several years ago and writing about it because I have a blog now)

I don't know if this is still a big topic, but back in the 2010s one of the biggest controversies in gaming was, weirdly not microtransactions in video games, I mean that was big, but it doesn't seem like it was as big as whether or not Dark Souls should have an easy mode. Yeah, this was a weird argument, because there were two sides arguing for something "bad" in general, one side wanted "to remove the point of Dark Souls", and the other side "didn't want it to be accessible", in fact accessibility seems to be a dirty word in gaming for some reason. I don't know, you'd think people would want their favourite hobby to be more accessible so that hobby could... you know, keep existing. What I think about the idea of Dark Souls having an easy mode, honestly it's irrelevant at this point, I've made it my life goal to never play Dark Souls to spare my wallet, my game controllers, my sanity, and probably someone's safety... I have anger issues. Yet it has always been nagging in the back of my mind, and there is a really good reason for it.

Dark Souls is not a game I can ignore easily, beyond the fact that it is a popular franchise. Dark Souls appears to be a game with deep lore, unique characters and a very intricate theme, which is what people point to when they say Dark Souls should not have an easy mode. This is stuff I want to experience because I am a big proponent of games being art, but again... anger issues. It's like wanting to watch a horror movie despite the fact that you're easily scared, which is one of the arguments made in defense of Dark Souls not having an easy mode, and that makes sense. I mean, you can't really make a "Not scary" horror movie, right? Oh wait... they have.

I remember seeing this argument on a Tumblr blog ages ago, and it irked me then, but I didn't quite know why. At the time I simply brushed it off as "Video Games aren't movies, stop comparing them", but now I think I know why that argument irks me. Yes, video games aren't movies, because they treat genre as two separate things.

What is a genre? A genre is essentially a category with tropes and mechanics that denote which movie, game, book or whatever, is. Really it's a label with expectations, for example a Gross-out Comedy movie is going to be a movie that is hopefully funny with a lot of bodily jokes, and a First-Person shooter video game is gonna be a video game from the perspective of the player character where you shoot things. Immediately I think you can see the difference, video game genres focus more on mechanics while movie genres is more about content, which is not to say that video games can't be labeled by content, but I think most people will say that Telltale's The Walking Dead is an "Episodic Adventure" before they say it's a "Drama".

Video games tend not to be labeled as "Comedies" or "Thrillers", not because there aren't games that can be labeled as such, but because those labels don't describe how the game works, the term "Metroidvania" may be confusing to gamers who don't know what Metroid or Castlevania: Symphony of the Night are, but if you're even vaguely familiar with how those games work, a game like Shantae and the Pirate's Curse, Dead Cells, or Cave Story can be understood. Likewise, if you're familiar with how Dark Souls operates, you'll be able to understand how other "Souls-likes" work. Movies work in a similar but different enough way, for example rather than knowing how a "Gross-Out Comedy" or a "Slasher Horror" would "Work" per se,  it's more of what to "expect". To put it simply, Video Game genre labels imply how the game works, Movie genre labels imply what to expect. Arguably they're similar things, I mean, you know what to expect when I say "Metroidvania" and you know how a movie will work when I say "Slasher Horror", but specifically looking at what they mean for their respective medium, that is where the differences begin to matter.

This especially matters a lot with "Genre Mixing", which is when a movie blends two genres together. The example I'm going to use is gonna destroy the notion that you can't make horror movies for people who don't like horror movies, because there have been movies like that made, usually they blend comedy in with the horror to make it less scary. Ghostbusters, Gremlins, Beetlejuice, Evil Dead 2 and Army of Darkness, we can even throw Young Frankenstein in there even though that one is more of a spoof comedy than horror comedy, I mean these aren't traditional horror movies but they have elements and tropes of horror in them. On top of that, it isn't just comedy that you can do this with, you can make a horror superhero movie (The Crow), a horror musical (Repo: The Genetic Opera), a horror romance (Warm Bodies), horror fantasy (Pan's Labyrinth or Coraline), and the best thing about it is that they can all ease viewers into more traditional horror.

You can also mix some parts of video game genres too, like you can have a Fighting game that's also a platformer (Super Smash Bros.), or a First-Person Shooter game that's also a Hack and Slash (Red Steel 2), or a First-Person Shooter that's also a puzzle game (Portal), but those are more exceptions to the rule, as most fighting games are more like Street Fighter or Mortal Kombat, most First-Person Shooters are more like Call of Duty or Doom, and most hack and slash games are like Devil May Cry or Dynasty Warriors. Each game may have their own twist on the mechanics, their own identity from each other, but at the end of the day, they are still within their genres.

I think my ultimate point is the very obvious, "Video Games are not Movies", which... quite frankly nobody needed a long blog post to be convinced of, but I wanted to go more into the "why" of it. Why aren't video games the same as movies? Why should we treat them as separate entities? I think this may also go to explain why a lot of Video Game Movies and Movie Based Video Games just straight up suck, you know, other than the obvious "Nobody cared to make something good and just wanted to strike while the thing was popular" answer. I think I also want to stress that accessibility is more than just features in a game, it's being helpful outside of the game. If you see someone who is struggling to get into Dark Souls, maybe you should help them by giving them hints and tips, or you could offer them a game that is similar but probably more their speed. After all, if you can't make someone a horror fan by immediately showing them John Carpenter's The Thing, how could you make someone a Dark Souls fan by doing essentially the same thing?

Also, don't expect me to talk about video games that much here, this is just something that's been on my mind and I wanted to write it out.

Kung Fu Panda 3 (2016) - A Phenomenal Cap to a Phenomenal Trilogy

 

I love doing marathons like this, because they really give me the chance to watch movies that I have had on my watchlist for far too long. I have seen both of the first two Kung Fu Panda movies before, but I never did get around to watching the third one, and it has been on my watchlist for far too long. I have always wondered how they were going to follow up such a fantastic movie as Kung Fu Panda 2, that is a sentence I never thought I would string together unironically. Kung Fu Panda 2 was a movie I feared any sequel would die by comparison to, and it also is one of those movies that I feel wouldn't need a follow up, like you already reached higher than many others would have, why go further? It is attitudes like this which is why I talk about movies instead of making them. I will not say that Kung Fu Panda 3 is better than 2, or even that it is on the same level, but I'll be damned if it ain't close.

Once again, the story feels like a natural progression from the last, the writer's asking "Where do we go from here?". The answer ended up being quite simple... they never did answer who Po actually is in the last movie, they defined his past, but now they have to define him. Po discovers that his birth father, and a whole society of pandas, are still alive but his excitement is held back by the news that an old adversary of Master Oogway's, by name of Kai, has returned from the spirit realm, and only a master of chi can stop him. Po returns to the Panda village to learn how to be a panda and master his chi. The writers of these movies really knew where to go from the previous ones, and some people have noted that the three movies, specifically their villains, represent Body, Mind and Spirit. In a sense, these are the journey's Po takes throughout the trilogy, learning Kung Fu, learning to accept his trauma and learning to master his Chi; Body, Mind, Spirit. I will say, it does go into some predictable places this time around, I mean you hear enough stories you can tell where some stories are going to go, but ultimately I think this movie is just as strong with the story and theme as the last two.

Then we also have the characters and relationships, rather than look at Po's relationship with the Furious Five, this movie examines Po's relationship with his father, both his fathers, but more especially his adoptive father, Mr. Ping. I don't want to give away too much, but Mr. Ping actually might have my favourite scene in the entire trilogy. I do think Kai is a bit of a step-down villain wise, not that he is a bad villain, in fact as a villain I think he is the best threat in the series, but that came at the sacrifice of what made the other villains great. Tai Lung was a great villain because of his ties to Shifu, his pride and ego made him the perfect foil to Po, while Lord Shen's ties to Po laid out the tragedy in Po's journey. What made both the villains great was that their connections, and Kai's connection is predominately to a character who isn't even in the movie that much. It's kind of weird to think about, but the greatest villain in these movies is actually the one I kind of like the least. I like Po's father fine enough, he definitely has that Della Duck energy of someone who is trying to be a good parent but is really out of their depth. I do genuinely believe that he feels hurt when he hurts Po, and I love the scene with him and Ping, I think he's a fine character at the end of the day.

You know, I haven't really talked much about the actors in these movies, outside of Jack Black and the villains. It's a shame because, J.K. Simmons genuinely is one of my favourite voice actors ever, and he does a great performance as Kai, and Bryan Cranston is practically perfect casting for Po's father. However, the one actor I really want to give credit to is James Hong as Mr. Ping. James Hong has a decades long career in Movies, TV and even Video Games, and it is a disservice to only talk about the few movies I know him from, I mostly know him from Mulan and I also recognized him in Wendell & Wild and Everything Everywhere All at Once, but that is barely scratching the tip of his career. I mention that because, Mr. Ping is the first role of his where I really got to hear how good of an actor he can be, I mean you don't have a decades long career if you aren't a good actor, he gives genuine resentment, concern, vulnerability, truthfully I don't think Mr. Ping's arc would be half as good in these movies is anyone else was in the role, and James Hong kind of falls into the Vincent Prince category where I just can't picture him the voice recording booth, his performance is really good. I said Jack Black was perfectly cast as Po, and I still stand by that, but I can still picture him in the booth, when I think of James Hong's performance as Mr. Ping, I just think of Mr. Ping.

As for the animation, genuinely I think this is the best looking movie out of the three. Two looked stunning, but this movie's colour palettes and choreography go beyond that. I called Kung Fu Panda 2 a "gilded lily", well Kung Fu Panda 3 is trying to gild a gilded lily, and it succeeded in the visual department. The opening fight scene with Oogway and Kai immediately drew me into the movie and all the action scenes were just as good. I mean, I really can't explain just how amazing the animation of this movie is, and it isn't just that the movie looks good either. The writing of this movie deserves as much credit as the visuals do, because I think this movie might actually be the funniest of the three. Kung Fu Panda 1 definitely was a cheesy kung fu movie for kids, and while the comedy of this one definitely has a similar vibe at times, I dunno, I think the writing and performances gave me some genuinely good laughs beyond the genre.

I'm glad I finally got the chance to watch Kung Fu Panda 3. There always is a slight worry when going into any movie I think, and it is kind of worse when you're going into a sequel, especially a sequel to an already fantastic movie. At the end of the day, I can't think of a finer trilogy of animated movies, sure Toy Story is a good trilogy, but I think I'd put the Kung Fu Panda movies over the Toy Story movies. If I had to end a trilogy, I would try to end it like Kung Fu Panda 3, it was beautifully animated, thematically fit with the previous movies, had great characters, performances and genuinely good choreography, it's funny, charming, exciting, emotional, it's everything we love about the Kung Fu Panda movies. I think two is still my favourite, but three is definitely up there, and I can't think of a trilogy more deserving a perfects across the board. This is another High Recommendation, and honestly... I have some concerns, but I am mostly excited for the upcoming fourth movie.

And hey, this was my ninety-ninth movie review, and boy do I have something special for review number one-hundred.