Sunday, October 3, 2021

Monster High: 13 Wishes (2013) - Nothing special, but harmless

Well, it's the October month, and that means spooky scary fun and also spooky silly fun. Last year I didn't end up reviewing any kind of spooky movie, I got a copy of The Thief and the Cobbler earlier and I really wanted to talk about it, and I also looked at the Recobbled Cut that same month. So, this year I thought I'd make up for the lack of a spooky review by taking a look at a Monster High movie... Goodie. Well, hey I enjoyed My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, I have a soft spot for Jem and the Holograms, and I've watched Ruby Gloom growing up, so maybe this won't be so bad. Also, if you're wondering, I chose 13 Wishes because it is the one I am the most familiar with, in the sense that it was the only one I knew existed and vaguely what it was about. Thanks online internet video game reviewers!

Plotwise it is about the younger sister of Clawdeen Wolf, Howleen (As an aside, I hate these names) finding a magic lantern and summoning a Genie, who gives her thirteen wishes. You can  probably tell where this goes, but to the movie's credit, they do twist your expectations a little bit. First off, this genie has an evil shadow doppelgänger, which is not a part of genies that I have seen before, but also is that while Howleen does begin to make selfish wishes, she actually does start by trying to make others happy. It isn't until she gets bullied by others that the shadow genie begins to manipulate her into using the wishes selfishly. It's actually kind of clever, or it would be if the bullying was more than two sentences. Otherwise, you know what you're going to get with this plot, character gets ultimate power, uses it unwisely and almost puts a great evil in power. The plot is nothing that special.

I think that is my biggest problem with the movie, or should I say, special. Yeah, this would be another "Technically" review, but the movie is over an hour long. Despite that, it really is not written or edited like a movie. Most movies would hold on shots or let scenes linger to really let the weight of the scene take hold, they can do this because they have a rather lengthy time limit to really experiment with. A television show does not have this time to play around with, so emotional scenes have to be done differently. The ending conversation between Pearl and Amethyst in the Steven Universe episode "On The Run" would probably have been written differently if it was for a movie. This movie is not really written or edited like a movie and more like an extended television episode, which I'll be honest, is only a problem if that is not what you're expecting. I hear people complain that some movies based on shows are "Just an extended episode" and I usually never see that, well, now I think I know why, those movies are still written and edited like movies.

Character wise, well... I mean they aren't bad. The main cast are friendly and want to help people, which is nice, Clawdeen is very much the "Big sister", but she doesn't really remind me of my brother like the sister in "Whisper of the Heart" did, in that she doesn't come off like she's trying to be a controlling figure in her younger sibling's life. Gigi the genie is kind of bland, honestly so is the villain Whisp, she's just kind of your basic villain. Howleen is a high school girl, probably freshman, maybe sophomore, I'm sure some Monster High fan is gonna correct me on that one. I dunno, the characters to me never seem to go beyond the basic characteristics that we expect of characters like these. I will say, I do like one of the background characters, just a dude with an eyeball as his head, it's like if someone from The Residents was a cartoon character, and I adore it.

I also have a few criticisms with the voices. For the most part the actors do fine, I never heard a flat read or a bad take in there, but a few of them out on rather generic accents, and Draculaura's voice is clearly pitched up a little, like other people noticed that right? I just found it really distracting. Otherwise, again the voice acting was fine. That is also my opinion of the animation, it isn't bad, it's smooth and has some appeal to it, but television quality 3D animation is never going to look as good as it could.

Really that is the best thing to take away from this review, this is a television movie, and it feels like it. On some level I do have to admire the fact that they didn't try to emulate a theatrical experience. I think if you go into this movie knowing what you're gonna get, you might have a good time. Nothing about this movie is that special, but it isn't terrible, as a whole I can recommend this is a certain type of audience. Hey, there is nothing wrong with a movie that is made for specific audiences. If you want a silly spooky something to put on this Halloween, well I'd recommend other things first, but if you want to try something new, I don't see the harm in this one. I may only slightly recommend it, but it's still a recommendation.

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