2020 has been one Hell of a year, trust me it's been a ride for me as well, even as a non American, and honestly, I think one of the most sour things I had to accept was, well a lot of things, but relevant to this post is not being able to see the new SpongeBob movie in theatres.
Why does that hurt so much? Well, I have been a SpongeBob fan for literally my entire life. The first cartoon I remember watching was SpongeBob, and to this day SpongeBob is still one of my favourite shows and one of my favourite characters. I don't remember seeing the first SpongeBob movie in theatres (Though don't take my word on that one because I would have been six at the time), and I had no chance of seeing the second one in theatres on account of me being a broke high school student. In a way, it's kind of a Shakespearian tragedy of sorts that I have never officially been able to see one of my all time favourite franchises on the big screen. Yes, the movie is in theatres in Canada, where I live, but I'm not going to the theatre during the pandemic, so, no I have never been able to see any of the SpongeBob movies on the big screen with a crowd. It's sad, but that is what happens sometimes.
Well, the movie came to Netflix for other viewers so I was able to watch it and... I really want to like this movie.
Okay, so, it's almost the end of the year and I have a bunch of movies to watch for the end of the year, and some movies are still coming out so I don't really know how many I'll get done. I've seen some really bad animated movies like Pets United, Scoob! and the latest piece of garbage from that festering dumpster heap of a studio known as Vanguard, Fe@rLeSS_. So, with all of that under my belt, I can't be too hard on this movie, but... I'm sorry, it wasn't that good.
I think... I don't actually know what I think. It is often hard to pin-down what exactly makes SpongeBob good in the first place. For me, it's a really funny show that makes me feel like a young kid eagerly running for the TV again, even as an adult, a lot of the jokes and writing in SpongeBob is genuinely funny, and I'll admit there were some moments that made me laugh in this movie, I don't think they were as strong as the show's high points, but they were decently amusing. The problem is, those jokes were few and far between, not that any joke really fell hard or became cringey, but nothing really elicited much of a response from me.
The pros of this is that the movie doesn't really become unwatchable, but the downside is that the movie ends up being kinda boring. Let me explain with an example of the movie: The climax involves running through castle halls, SpongeBob and friends piloting a suit of armour like a Gundam, and said suit of armour falling out a window and the gang having to chase it down to catch it to save Squidward, I should not be thinking about skipping any part of that segment.
There is another weird scene where SpongeBob and Patrick are dreaming, they meet the head of Keanu Reeves inside of a tumbleweed, go into a saloon for pirate zombie cowboys who have a song number with Snoop Dogg, and they're being held prisoner by a demon played by Machete himself Danny Trejo. That was a more entertaining scene in the movie, but it still wasn't entertaining by that much.
The animation is kind of a mixed bag. On the one hand, it is bright and colourful and pretty to look at, for the most part. The other hand is that the CG models are not the best the characters have looked in CG, I mean, they have looked worse, but they didn't look that good, I think they looked better in the previous movie, Sponge Out of Water. Still, it wasn't the worst I've seen, after a movie like Fe@rLeSS_ any CG animation looks better... from big studios anyway, but it still didn't sit right with me.
It hurts that I don't like this movie, I actually really hate having to say all this, this movie had people who worked hard on it, and I have nothing but love and admiration for the late Stephen Hillenburg, and I have faith that the team behind this movie wanted to make something that he would have loved. I just, didn't love it myself. Could it have been worse? Yes, but it most certainly could have been better. I think at the end of the day, you're either going to enjoy it, or not, but not in the Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas kind of way where that is the entire point, more in the Hazbin Hotel kinda way where it's most likely just not going to be your cup of tea.
If you love SpongeBob even more than I do, or think it's something you might enjoy, or even just want to kill an hour and a half with something that's not super serious, hey, give it a watch, you might get more out of it than me, and that's great. Who knows, maybe I'll find more out of it upon repeated viewings, hey it's a SpongeBob movie, I'm still gonna buy it on DVD when it comes out, I just don't think I'll watch it as much as the first or second movies. Still, depending on who you are, you might get more out of it than me, so I'll give it a slight recommendation.
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